The Counselor's Corner

What Are Natural and Logical Consequences to Negative Behavior?

A natural consequence is an event that normally or naturally happens to a child following his behavior unless you step in to prevent the consequences. For example, a child who refuses to wear his mittens will have cold hands.  If a child acts mean to a friend, the friend may choose not to play with him for the rest of recess or play date, whichever the case may be.  Parents who use natural consequences believe that children learn to improve their behavior when they are allowed to experience naturally occurring consequences for their own decisions and actions.  A child who does not complete a homework assignment will be unprepared for class and may need to complete homework during a preferred activity of the school day such as recess or quiet time.

Sometimes parents cannot allow for natural consequences to occur because it is dangerous to the child. For example, a parent cannot allow a young child to ride a bike into a busy street filled with traffic and experience the natural consequence of getting harmed. However, a parent can stop the child and take away bike privileges for a period of time.  This is what is known as a logical consequence.  If siblings argue incessantly, a natural consequence may be to cancel a preferred family activity.  If a child’s schoolwork is poor because of video games, removing video games and/or other electronics until the work improves would be a logical consequence.  Withholding dessert for poor schoolwork is an illogical consequence because there is no relation between the two elements.  When children see a clear and reasonable relationship between their choices and the consequences, they are more likely to change their behavior.  It can be difficult to think of logical consequences. Recently, I spent almost 30 minutes searching around my child’s school for items he left behind.  I told him he owed me 30 minutes of doing whatever I wanted him to do to pay me back for my time.  I challenge you to talk with other parents to develop your own lists of logical consequences for your children.

Adapted from SOS Help for Parents; A Practical Guide for Handling Common Everyday Behavior Problems by Lynn Clark, Ph.D.